Confusion
by MrZsasz
Summary: The Boss is bad at expressing her feelings. But Kinzie is even worse. Kinzie/fem!Boss, one-shot.


**Author's Note: Hello! This is my first attempt to write serious fanfiction. I hope you will enjoy your reading and I'm sorry for the mistakes (if there any, you are welcome to notify me of them), because English, as much as I love this language, isn't my native. Here we go! :)**

_«Hey Kinzie, you wanna fuck?»_

I knew it was coming. I wasn't waiting for it, no. I just knew it. All your friendships survive this part – it's your way to confirm any kind of relation.

I was kind of insulted that it didn't happen sooner; just when we were alone on the ship you made your move. You had Keith too, but preferred me. It wasn't because of me; you just couldn't fuck your Vice-President, the man, who'll be after you. You couldn't even stand a thought about it.

It wasn't a surprise. At least I would get to know how our precious Boss is in bed.

I let my gaze go wandering while I was lifting my head up to see your face. You weren't even wearing this smirk of yours; you appeared so dead serious about sex. It wasn't a joke for you. Despite the fact that your green piercing eyes were sparkling in anticipation. I stood up, getting laptop off my knees.

"Let's go."

Your grin was back in place; but not for long. I smacked soft skin of your pretty face with my hard fist, hurting your cheek with sharp knuckles. Confused expression changed previous seducing one. I jumped right in your opened arms; you were fast, your reaction immediate; your lips were on mine in no time.

* * *

"And what was that punch for?" you asked, getting up to gather your clothes and show me a wonderful sight on your back.

"It sets the mood."

"Oh, really? Well, I am disappointed that you haven't used your whips, chains and handcuffs, Kensington. I bet you have a whole fucking wardrobe, full of stuff like this"

"If I answer, level of your disappointment will increase."

You are laughing. Sincerely, like you always do.

"Damn, who are you and where is Kinzie? This fucker Zinyak hasn't kidnapped you too, has he?"

"Not funny." I am smiling too. Maybe it's stupid, but I have always loved your jokes. There are quite dumb, but they have their own charm.

"Fuck him anyway."

Full-clothed, you grinned one more time and walked away, saying "'Till next time."

* * *

Surprisingly so, the next time happened really soon. You returned back to the ship, and cared enough to pay me a visit.

_«Hey Kinzie, you wanna fuck?»_

You're smiling widely, your eyes glowing with impatience and something, that I didn't really catch. Maybe it was desire, want. Even need. Though I bet my eyes showed it clearer than yours.

My laptop was on the ground in seconds; it weren't my hands, which removed it from my lap. Your face was close. I wanted to snap for touching my things and interrupting, but I found myself not being able to do so. Feeling numb and speechless, I blamed your fucking cocky smirk that turned me on. I couldn't make a single sound to express my disagreement with your timing; so you assumed that silence was a sign of agreement instead. Without waiting for my response, you were kissing me. It's aggressive and passionate; everything I like. You licked my bottom lip, asking permission. Strangely enough, huh, now you want it? It was stupid not to answer, so I let you shove your tongue down my throat. My body was on fire and suddenly I was aware of every movement of yours; your hands roaming, touching and caressing my back. There was a huge difference between your actions; lips being tough and pushy, and palms being soft and gentle. As much as I didn't want to admit, but, maybe I enjoyed the 'gentle' side a bit more.

Our lips parted, and as if your mind was back in control of your hands, you stopped your simple ministrations and focused on ripping my clothes off. I was about to ask not to do so, because we hadn't a bunch of spare costumes to wear. I doubted that it would stop you anyway; you were never known as practical.

So, shreds of cloth which used to be my clothes soon were lying on the floor. I did felt angry at some point; so I decided that it was time to change roles. You're pinned on my giant pillow in one swift motion; my knee came between your legs; your reaction was instant. A loud moan. As I proceed my actions, ripping your clothes (I deserved a revenge, didn't I?), your moans grew louder. Eventually we would reach a point when the sounds we made would be echoed on the whole ship, making it very clear to the crew what their precious President was doing.

There was nothing special in what we did. I thought so.

We laid in peaceful silence for a while, listening how our quickened breath was returning back to normal. Eventually we ended up hugging on my seat; my head was resting on your sweaty bare chest; your arms around my shoulders. Despite time had passed, your heart still raced a little faster than necessary. I didn't find it odd then. What I did found odd was how strangely I felt in your embrace. It was warm and cozy, reminding me of my bed back on Earth. I couldn't even bring myself to mind this; I was never the type of cuddling. Before I could get all confused, you were saying something. You suggested to 'hit the shower' with something in your voice which I could've called shyness if it wasn't you all along. I struggled to think straight but my body refused, snuggling even closer to you. Against my will, my mouth moved and formed a single word. It was enough for you.

* * *

_«Hey Kinzie, you wanna fuck?»_

It had been a week since Earth was blown. It had been a week since you picked up a routine of visiting me every day. It's been today when I realised.

I was in the main room, working with the simulation code, when Shaundi and Asha entered. They were talking loud enough for me to hear; they also weren't paying attention to their background which made it perfect. I listened without interest at first; they were discussing our current situation. Earth, 7 billon people died blah-fucking-blah. All of this I had heard before. They moved from this to the ship, and suddenly I heard something I probably shouldn't have.

"You know what's weird?" said Shaundi, apparently laughing. "Boss still hasn't suggested me sex."

"Same here." Asha shrugged. "I guess Kinzie gets all the fun."

"I told you about our Boss. You gotta know that it's VERY strange of her to settle on just one person. Do you wanna know what I think?"

"What?" Asha seemed curious.

"Boss likes Kinzie." Shaundi said it seriously, although it was clear that she was amused with that fact. "Maybe she doesn't realise it, but I am positive she has feelings for her. Hell, even their arguing turned in more 'married-couple-arguing' way."

"I noticed that too…" Asha said something more, but I wasn't listening. Could it be true? Boss had feelings for me? But I didn't like her this way, did I?

I was asking myself this question a lot. Too much for my liking. And then you appeared with your cheerful smile on your rather beautiful (I can admit that) face. I liked your green cat-like eyes with the familiar mischievous glint. I liked her nice-shaped nose with cute freckles. I loved her plump rosy lips and her pink tongue for their obvious talents. I absolutely loved her silky red hair. I was keen on her neck; soft milk-coloured skin, but easily bruised; hickeys appeared immediately and stayed there a few days longer. I wondered how it was even possible for her not to have a whole body in scars. Maybe it was only your neck where your skin was so vulnerable.

Then I wondered what you could probably like in me, not counting my intelligence, of course. Messy auburn hair in a ponytail, glasses and no makeup. I didn't want to even think about my body; it was even more disappointing.

But you came here one way or another.

* * *

_«Hey Kinzie, you wanna fuck?»_

I wiped foxy grin off your face with my fist. It had been a while since I've done that.

The sex was rather confusing that night. It was as if I tried to put some distance between us by angrily biting, twisting, hurting you in more painful ways than usual; and you tried to close the distance with your tender lips and tentative fingers. You didn't mind my attitude; you just weren't coping with it.

It was the last straw when you pulled covers over our naked bodies instead of searching for your clothes in the mess we made.

"What are you doing?" I asked almost irritably. I bet you noticed that by slight flash of hurt in your eyes.

"Staying the night." You answered simply, facing the wall. I had a lot of words to say to you just then. But you dismissed all of it by falling asleep.

I huffed in annoyance but lied down too. There was no point in making you leave. There wasn't, was it?

I was pretty much aware of a body on the other side; I was aware of hands that had sneaked up on my waist in the middle of the night. What I feared was that I didn't mind.

* * *

"You fucking scared me, Kensington." You said, hugging me close, burying your face in my shoulder. "Don't do that again." You whispered, your hold tighten.

"What the fuck is wrong with you? Get off me!" I was determined to play aloof. I pushed you off, my fierce gaze meeting your worried (worried?) look. "And don't you dare tell anyone about what you saw there!"

You frowned like you gave a fuck. Like you were fucking concerned about me. Like Shaundi and Asha were right all along.

I stormed out of the room, my head spinning. You rescued me from Zinyak's nightmare, now what? Now what?

* * *

_«Hey Kinzie, you wanna fuck?»_

I haven't heard this phrase for three days in a row. Three fucking days.

Three days you've been trying to avoid me. Three days you haven't even played a single joke on me. Three days since I've put a stop to this fuck-buddies relationship.

Three days I've been telling myself that I didn't care at all. Three days of lying to myself. But I needed these three days.

When you finally appeared at my place with your usual smirk, I was relieved. So fucking relieved it hurt in my chest with pleasant ache.

In matter of seconds, before you could start your speech you had had in mind I was there, erasing all the words of unwanted apologies off your mouth. You answered by lightly biting my bottom lip, bringing the sense of familiarity; familiarity wasn't disappointing or boring: on the contrary. It hit the right spots, leaving me wanting more. Much more than just a sexual release.

I was relieved when you didn't stop, unzipping my uniform from the front.

I was relieved to feel you inside again.

Then I realised.

I realised I had it bad.

**So, um, here we are. Thanks for finishing it! A review is always appreciated :)**


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